A wedding is one of the most important events in our lives - it’s not just another party where we come to eat, dance, and socialize; it is much more than that! It symbolizes the union of two people who, through this act, convey to each other: "I know you are not perfect, and neither am I - but I have decided that I want to grow, change, learn, lose, and win with you." For this reason, many couples find themselves torn between a traditional wedding and eloping to another country to get married! Both choices have their advantages and disadvantages, and that is why it is very important to look deep within yourself before making any decision and to choose what resonates with you and your values (not someone else's).
Below are a few questions that will help you make this decision:
How much time are you willing to invest in planning the wedding?
When it comes to weddings, there are basically two main paths: the traditional big bash or the intimate elopement. And let me tell you, the difference in planning these two types of weddings is like night and day. If you’ve ever been involved in planning a large wedding, you know it can turn into a logistical nightmare. You’ve got to coordinate with a small army of people, from the bride and groom to the caterers, photographers and, of course, the guests.
Imagine inviting 300 people from all over the world you’ve got to think about accommodations, transportation, and seating arrangements— It’s like a game of chess, trying to figure out who can sit next to whom! On the flip side, there’s the beauty of eloping. With just the two of you (and maybe a witness or two), the planning is a breeze. You can focus on what truly matters: your desires and preferences. Want to get married on a mountaintop? Go for it! Dreaming of a beach ceremony at sunset? Why not! The only opinions you need to consider are your own, which means less stress and more fun.
So, if you’re someone who values simplicity and has a short fuse for drama, eloping could be your best bet. You get to skip the headaches of coordinating a massive event and dive straight into the adventure of your new life together. In the end, it’s all about what makes you happy, and sometimes, less really is more!
Ask yourself - what is your character, what are your values?
I will give you an example from my experience to help you make this decision - before I started getting into photography and planning elopements, I knew I wouldn’t have a large traditional wedding because it simply didn't resonate with my character. I’m not particularly traditional; the wedding customs in the country I come from don’t align with my ideals and values, and the thought of being the center of attention all day scares the introvert in me! I have always viewed a wedding as an event that should be private and one that I want to share only with my partner and my family... the fewer people, the better! The same goes for you - ask yourself whether you want to share your wedding day with as many relatives and friends as possible, or if you are more of a private person who would prefer to share that celebration only with your closest ones?
What is your budget?
It's hard to enjoy a wedding when you know it comes with months, or perhaps even years, of expenses. This is a very important point to consider, and it's crucial to agree with your partner on a budget that is acceptable to both of you and how much you are willing to spend on your wedding. Not everyone has the same priorities, so it's essential to be on the same page about this, as it will be difficult to organize a wedding for 200 people if your budget only covers the costs for 20 people.
Are you ready to be real?
When it comes to weddings, there’s often a standard script that people feel compelled to follow. You know the drill: a stunning dress, fancy catering, and an extravagant venue. But I’m here to say that the best weddings are more than that!
The couple should be completely pampered here and listen to their desires! When we talk about weddings, most people first think of a beautiful, romantic dress, excellent catering, and grand, lavish venues. However, when I see a couple who has decided to stand before the altar, I see the entire journey they had to go through to stand together in front of it—those uncomfortable conversations that are hard to have but provide an opportunity for growth, all those little arguments about who is next to do the dishes where they had to learn what compromise means...
Successful relationships require immense growth, sacrifice, and compromise, and for that reason, I believe that you must be absolutely firm and real about your desires to somehow pay tribute to all the moments you have shared together even if it means ruffling some feathers.
Are you ready to embrace the whole spontaneity that comes with eloping?
Eloping with its promise of spontaneity and adventure is both thrilling and a bit daunting. The idea of jetting off to a distant country, far from the confines of traditional wedding planning is undeniably liberating. While exchanging vows beneath a stunning sunset in Bali or amidst the breathtaking landscapes of Iceland—those moments can feel electric! However, I totally get why some folks might be scared off by the lack of formality - the big wedding celebration—the gathering of family and friends, the fancy dress, the cake-cutting It’s a chance to share love and joy with everyone they care about. So, while eloping offers an exciting break from tradition, it can also leave some feeling a bit nostalgic for those grand celebrations and all the heartfelt moments they may miss. Each decision has it's pros and cons and it's up to you to figure out what is truly important to you?
I hope this article helped you with your decision and remember, no matter if you decide to elope or go for a grand traditional wedding, make sure to soak in every moment of your special day. Trust me, it’ll fly by faster than you can imagine! Enjoy every second!
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